


The Thing That Might Be

by fergus80



Series: Carmen AU [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-08
Updated: 2015-03-08
Packaged: 2018-03-16 21:32:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3503489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fergus80/pseuds/fergus80
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a small rewrite of the episode of Dream A Little Dream of Me (Most is actually the episode but with some slight and also one obvious change.). This is part 3 of my Carmen!Verse. I would REALLY recommend going to read those stories before this one, or it really won’t make much sense.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Thing That Might Be

Dean listened to the recording on the other end of the phone. “This is Carmen. I’m not available right now. Please…” He sighed into the phone. He had left countless messages. And it wasn’t like she wasn’t getting them. Because by this point, he had left so many her voicemail would say it was full. So she had to be deleting his messages. When the beep came he spoke, “Carmen, it’s Dean. Please, just let me know you are okay. A short message. A text. Something. I know it’s not fair but...” he sighed, “I don’t have much time left, and I would just at least like an answer. Please?” He knew it was useless. He had begged before, literally begged after one night of just a little too much scotch. He hung up, and put his cell in his coat before he entered the bar. The bar that he had tracked Sam down too.

And there he was, sitting at a bar, nursing a drink, wayyyy to early in the morning for Sammy. He walked up to his brother and the bar, “There you are. What are you doing?”

Sam looked over at him, his speech was already a little slurred, “Having a drink?” He answered as he shrugged his shoulders.

Dean’s eyes widened, “It’s two in the afternoon.” He took a closer look at the glass, “Drinking Whisky?”

“I drink whisky all the time,” Sam responded defensively.

“No you don’t.”

“What’s the big deal? You get sloppy in bars. Lately, especially. Why can’t I?”

Sam did have a point. Lately, he had dragged him out of some bars two sheets to the wind. And thankfully had stopped him a couple times from calling Carmen like that. But, he hadn’t caught all of them. He shook it off and then looked around the bar. There weren’t too many females in the place. And definitely none that were Sam’s, let alone his type. And that said a lot. “Slim pickings around here. What’s going on with you?”

He looked into his drink, “I tried Dean.”

“To do what?” he asked confused.

“To save you,” he said quietly, even more focused on his drink.

Dean sighed and sat down next to his brother. Waved at the bartender, “Can I get a whiskey, double, neat?”

Sam shook his head and looked towards him, “I’m serious Dean.”

“No, you’re drunk.”

“I mean where you’re goin’, what you’re going to become… I can’t stop it. I’m starting to think, that maybe even Ruby can’t stop it.

Dean felt very uncomfortable when he said that. Fact was Ruby had already told him that she couldn’t save him. But he shook it off, as Sam kept going.

“But really the thing is, is that no one can save you.”

“What I been telling you.”

Sam shook his head again, “No, that’s not what I meant. No one can save you because you don’t want to be saved. I mean how can you care so little about yourself? Other people care about you. But you don’t. What’s wrong with you?

The two stared at each other for a moment, Dean was going to make a retort but his phone went off and he answered it. “Hello? Yes, this is Mr. Sniderson. What? Where?” 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

Bobby might have finally woken up, but the killer, the dream walker was still out there. With Bobby’s and his own DNA. He was ticked with himself, and more so as the hours went on. He was driving and going nuts. He was over caffeinated, and way to sleep deprived. After hearing the bad news from Bobby that him and Bella had turned up no new leads, he was giving up. He pulled off the road and could hear Sam asking him what the hell he was doing.

He turned off the car, and leaned back. He was through. He was going to bring the dream walker to him. Of course his brother wouldn’t let him go alone. Dean rubbed the side of his head where the hairs were ripped from. Soon they were both out like a light. 

Then in what seemed like seconds they were both awake... in the car. They looked at each other, not sure what was going on. Cautiously they both got out of the Impala. Soon Dean heard music playing, and as if he was drawn to it, he walked closer. Then an image filled his sight. A blanket was sitting on the grass, a picnic basket, and then a woman with dark brown hair had her back to him. She was on her knees and slowly turning towards him. Her arms were outstretched as she was holding on to two smaller hands. She smiled over at him. “Hey, aren’t you going to get the video camera?” He could see her lead a small baby taking a few steps over the blanket. “Sammy’s just about to take a few steps here. You don’t want to miss it.”

Dean couldn’t stop staring. His heartbeat was going faster and faster. He could feel Sam’s eyes on the back of his head. He wasn’t going to lie. He had this dream all the time now. Well, not this exact dream, variations on the dream. He could almost see Sam giving him a sorry look and he couldn’t take it, “Stop lookin’ at me like that.”

Sam cleared his throat, “Sorry.”

Carmen picked the baby up, sat little Sammy in her lap, and had the baby wave at him, “Say Hi to daddy.” 

His heart was breaking at the sight, and then she faded away. He looked around and ran over to the spot. He then looked up at Sam, “Where did she go?”

Sam was about to respond when they both heard movement in the woods. Then they saw a glimpse of a person and gave chase through the woods. Running through the trees they somehow split up, and as Dean turned around to look for Sam he was no longer in the woods, but in a hallway. He slowly started to move down the hallway, the last door started to open on it’s own. He quietly made his way inside the door, to see someone sitting at a desk, turning the light on and off, again and again. “Jeremy?” He asked, waiting. The other form stood up and then turned around. Dean took a breath at seeing himself. “Well aren’t you a handsome son of a gun.”

Dream Dean shook his head, “We need to talk.”

Dean laughed, “I get it. I get it. I’m my own worse nightmare. That it? Huh?” The two Deans started to circle each other. “Kinda like Superman three, junkyard scene. A little Mono y mono with myself.”

Dream Dean just went on, “Joke all you want smart ass. You can’t lie to me. I know the truth. I know how dead you are inside. How worthless you feel. I know how you look into a mirror, and hate what you see.”

“Sorry pal. It’s not going to work.” He shook his head with a smirk, “You’re not real.”

“Sure I am. I’m you.”

“I don’t think so. See this is my siesta, not yours. All, I gotta do is snap my fingers and you go bye, bye.” Dean snapped his fingers. But nothing happened. He did it again, and again, the other Dean just smirked at him. 

“I’m not going anywhere. Neither are you.” At that the door to the room slammed shut. “Like I said, we need to talk.” They started to circle each other again. “I mean you’re going to Hell, and you won’t even lift a finger to stop it. Talk about low self esteem. But then again I guess it’s not that much of a life worth saving is it?

“Come on, wake up Dean.” He said to himself. “Come on, wake up.”

“I mean, after all, you’ve got nothing outside of Sam. You are nothing. You’re just mindless and obedient as an attack dog.”

“Oh come on, that’s not true,” he tried to say in his own defense. 

“Oh? What are the things that you want? What are the things that you dream? Carmen? She obviously doesn’t want you. Your car? That’s Dads. Your favorite leather Jacket? Dads. Your Music? Dads. Do you even have an original thought? NO! All there is, is watch out for Sammy. Look after your little brother boy. You gave up your life. Your life with possibly a family. For what? To do what your daddy told you? You can still hear your dad’s voice in your head can’t you? Clear as a bell.”

Dean was getting very angry, “Just shut up.”

“But you think about it. All he ever did was train you. Boss you around. But Sam? Sam he dotted on. Sam was allowed a life. Allowed school. Allowed Jessica. Sam... Sam he loved.”

His hands were clenching as well as his jaw, “I mean it. I’m getting angry.”

“Dad knew who you really where. Good soldier and nothing else. Daddy’s blunt little instrument. Your own father didn’t care whether you lived or died. Why should you?”

Dean let go, yelling back, “Son of a bitch!” he picked up the shot gun up from the desk, everything else crashing to the floor. “My father was an obsessed bastard.” He kicked his own image into the wall. His foot kicked him, kicked the image of himself, over and over and over again. He quickly moved the gun over the others chest, holding him against the wall. “All that crap he dumped on me about protecting Sam. That was his crap. He’s the one that couldn’t protect his family.” He slammed the gun into his face. “He’s the one that let mom die. Who wasn’t there for Sam. I always was. It wasn’t fair. I didn’t deserve what he put on me. And I don’t deserve... to go to hell! He screamed as he pulled the trigger shooting himself twice in the chest. His double landed against the wall, eyes closed. He could feel the blood pumping though his veins as he slowly walked over to the body.

In a second the body sat back up, his eyes opening, revealing dark black demon eyes. “You can’t escape me Dean. You’re going to die. And this, this is what you are going to become.” And an instant later he was jerking awake back in the Impala. 

~*~~*~~*~~*~~*~

Now they had to get back on the road to search for Bella and the Colt. He zipped up his bag and stuffed it in the trunk. Sam threw his own bag in beside his. He looked up at his brother. “Hey Sam, I was wondering. When you were in my head, what did you see?”

Sam scratched the back of his head, and decided to go easy on his brother. “Uhhh, just Jeremy. I got separated from you. Easier to beat my brains out that way I guess. What about you? You never said.

“Nothing. I was looking for you the whole time.” He shut the trunk and went up to the drivers side. They both got in the car and Dean looked out the window. “Sam?”

“Yeah?”

He coughed, not exactly comfortable with what he was going to say. “I’ve been doing some thinking and... well the thing is... I don’t want to die... I don’t want to go to hell.

Sam nodded, “Alight. Yeah. We’ll find a way to save you.”

Dean gave a slight, nervous laugh, “Kay, Good.” They both nodded as he pulled out of the Hotel and onto the road, the music blaring.


End file.
